pulling you in, it’s vicious
taking no names but entering a place in your brain
swooping right in leaving you temporarily insane
A sweet mouth uttering words with pretty fluttering
leaving you stuttering and eventually suffering
while pulling you right in
sometimes feeling like a sin.
has a way
with the way her words sway
back and forth out loud.
A poet, if she knows it, doesn’t follow the crowd.
But rather instead creates documentations
of passionate situations
of temporary vacations
and sexual relations.
Yes, poetry can be delicious and inconspicuous
while leave you slightly fictitious instead …
or poetry can fly right over your head.
Strait up, what did you hope to learn about here? .. Current state of mind.
Grimm Women is back! Opening night is tomorrow (Thursday 2/6) at 6:30 pm and then Saturday & Sunday at 6:30 pm as well. I’m so excited! Email email@example.com to reserve your tickets at Manhattan Repertory Theatre and come see the crazy kids.
There’s no denying that life is hard in general but our early twenties - no bullshit - is scarier then middle school and high school put together, and those years were no cup of tea either. I used to think I handled change better than anyone I knew. “If I’m not changing, I’m not living” was a common phrase of mine and between my hair color, my style and my hobbies nothing ever stayed the same. I realize now that controlled change was what I really meant and change coming out of nowhere without any warning whatsoever was an entirely different story, a scary story. But at the same time I believe change is necessary and we all must learn how to properly deal with it or else fear of the unknown will literally paralyze us from properly evolving as human beings. I don’t think any of us knew what we were getting ourselves into when we began our early 20’s and I feel it’s impossible to be 100% prepared for it. And although God has been very good to me and on the outside some people may think I have it all … trust me… my quarter life crisis is just as real as any other 24 year old. In fact, I think mine may be a little more difficult than the average but that may just be my perception since sometimes I forget the world doesn’t actually revolve around me.
Now I’m sure a lot of you are wondering what I’ve been up to and what happened to style networks #1 show Jerseylicious. Allow me to clear the air and explain what’s going on. From June to October the cast and I spent our days filming season 6. At the end of the 10 episodes we filmed, we got news from our network saying we got picked up for another 10. About two weeks went by and then we heard the total opposite. Style network completely shut down and was(is) no longer a network. We were not getting picked up for another 10 episodes and beyond that, season 6 wasn’t airing Oct. 6 as planned. Now to this day I still don’t know whats going on and I’m assuming the rest of the cast doesn’t either. Hopefully Jerseylicious will get picked up by another network at some point and season 6 will air but there’s also a chance it could be gone forever. Crazy right? I always knew that the show wouldn’t last and if there was ever a moment I did forget, everyone around me would remind me. I can also say with full honesty that I never allowed Jerseylicious to define me since I knew one day it would be gone. But even so, nothing could prepare me for what life would be like after reality TV.
Someone once said.. “FAME is vapid”. Now the word “vapid” is just about my most favorite thing to say nowadays. It’s an ultra cool way to say “boring” or “predictable” (my absolute fear) and hits you hard like a ton of bricks. Some of you may not have known what vapid meant until i defined it for you just now but you knew when you read it that is was not a good thing. Yup. Vapid is pretty intense and so is being “famous” hence the term FAME IS VAPID and hence my inspiration behind these written thoughts.
But how do we really even define “famous” anyway? Does it mean being really really really well known? Do you have to be relevant in a lot of households? Is it calculated by the amount of twitter followers you have? (Can fame be bought as easily as buying your twitter followers?) And if you truly believe you’re “famous” does that mean you are? Can “fame” really be defined or are we all just our own versions of whatever it is we believe is our truth?
Many spiritual/metaphysical teachers believe that we are constantly dreaming, even when we are awake. There is no such thing as “reality” and everything we experience is pretty much relevant. “You think the world revolves around you? Don’t you?” is just about the most irritating thing to hear from someone because how the hell am I supposed to even answer that? We ALL live in our own world and have our own version of the truth and YES all believe the world actually revolves around us cause it sure as hell FEELS like it. We perceive everything as it happens to us and feel the undying need to explain everything. And anyone that would like to challenge me on this theory and say their reality is the “true” reality is a RA-TARD (Hangover reference, not meant to be offensive *)
I’m flying off topic. Basically I’m just here pondering a topic I’ve pondered many a times in the past four years. See, fame is a very tricky thing to me. It’s not really easily definable (not even to me) but it’s insanely desired which is a pretty scary thing. I mean, EVERYONE wants to be famous … for the most part. It’s definitely the most sought after career path because of the essence it has attached to it. Yeah .. being “famous” is just about the most amazing thing ever.